What a Difference a Month Makes
Part 1
(Sorry gang, it’s all about me.)
5/7/04
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f you have followed my “career”
as an Internet troublemaker, you don’t need to be reminded that, one, I
have a front engine dragster chassis with no motor. Two, my choice of motors
(the 426) was not allowed to run on nitro by a certain organization. And three,
I have whined about it almost constantly since the day the parade was rained
out on Nitro Avenue. Well, all that whining got me somewhere. In a roundabout
way, it got me into the driver’s seat of a nostalgia fuel Funny Car.
My fellow Internet troublemaker, Jeff Gaynor, and I started corresponding on things (okay, we were ganging up on people on the various Internet bulletin boards) and we hit it off. Jeff has a nostalgia fuel Funny Car that has had, for whatever reasons, three different drivers. He has every intention of driving it himself one day, but a couple of months ago he was looking for another driver for his car.
During our talks back and forth he asked if I knew Mike Demarest, his tuning consultant. Well, having done work for Mike at Hansen Chassis, I became even more excited to actually drive a car tuned by Mike. Mike, along with his brother and partner, Bill Schultz, were responsible for a lot of nitro cars getting into the win column during the glory days of So Cal drag racing. Jeff also has his neighbor Randy Hoggard helping out as a crew member. So that’s the entire team, Jeff, Mike and Randy.
This is where the title of the column comes into play. Within one month’s time, we as a team made sure that I could actually fit in the car, found a Funny Car helmet, got the car race-ready again after it had been sitting for five months, built assorted parts, added new chute levers so that I would actually be able to throw the chutes, made four runs in six hours to crossover from a long wheel base advanced ET license, serviced the car, went to a match race and made two full runs, serviced the car again and built weight bars to make weight for the VRA rules, went to Vegas, qualified number three and then ended up going to the final and losing to a holeshot. Whew! To say the last 30 days have been a blur would be an understatement! Add this to the usual 40-hour-a-week job, family, cleaning the cat litter box and all the other exciting things I do. It was hectic!
All that initial preparation was exciting, but the fun really started when the car was ready and we were at Los Angeles County Raceway, also known as “The Bernieplex,” for my license runs. After a morning spent harassing poor Robert Reehl on his cell phone so that we could meet him at his shop for some last minute accoutrements, everyone went to the track and we were ready to go. In attendance were Bob Godfrey, painter extraordinaire and fellow nostalgia Funny Car pilot, George Doty and Angry Steve and the gang from Hot Rods and Harleys. Mike Demarest, Randy, Pammy, and Thing One and Thing Two (my 4 and 5-year-old sons) were also there. Everyone was there except Dale Pulde, who Gaynor had forgotten to tell where we were going to do the runs. Dale and his dad assumed we were going to Bakersfield and drove all the way up to Famoso! So, after Dale got the correct information and headed back down our way, we warmed-up the car, towed up and got ready for my first squirt.
It had been a couple of years since I had made a lap in a real racecar. The last car I had driven was an alcohol dragster that my partners and I (Bryan Bruhn and Famous Amos Satterlee) ran in the Top Eliminator West series, a 6.30 index class. (Ego stroke alert! We won the series in 2001). What was interesting was that, while I was nervous, I was finding that I wasn’t getting as nervous as I would get in the alcohol car. I felt surprisingly comfortable in the Funny car. The vibe with all of the guys involved was calming, not stressful. Mike Demarest made a comment later that my eyes didn’t get big as he’s seen some people’s get when the engine is started.
While the motor was running, they lowered the body and I rolled forward for my first burnout without a throttle stop on a nitro motor! I rolled through the water, eased into the throttle and did a weak, pedal-it-once kind of thing. Here’s where I was in virgin territory - right after I lifted and started to coast, the cockpit filled up with smoke! This was new. I grabbed a little too much brake and hopped to a stop. I backed up and Bob brought me back and took me to the beams. I staged, left, and got the 330 cones! At the other end, I wasn’t happy with myself. When the guys got down there, Jeff lifted the body and in the tree was the 330 cone. We all had a laugh and went to get ready to try it again. Jeff tried to tell me that he lined me up sideways but I wasn’t buying it.
We did a little service before the next run. Pulde was in the house now, so he helped strap me in. He and Godfrey offered some good words and we towed up again and this time took the left lane. The burnout was better this time, no pedaling; I staged and, the next thing I knew, I was headed toward the wall! I lifted, corrected and made it down to a nine-something that was good enough for my first of three runs.
We got back and started talking about how the track might not be as good as it could be. I made the comment that I think I might be “behind” the car. After a discussion about tire pressure and so forth we went up again. On this lap, my burnout was a little better than before. I felt better backing up; I staged and ran it out to about half track and ran a 7.20 or so (NHRA has my time slips so I’m guessing). It was getting late and I needed one more run for my crossover. The guys said, “Let’s go for it,” so we serviced the car and took it up. The burnout was okay. I backed up and staged, left, and ran a 6.71 at 210 mph and that was after getting out of it twice on the run.
On the last run I actually felt like I was with the car and my brain was getting
back in “race mode.” With the help of everyone involved (including
Godfrey and Pulde signing my paperwork) I got my cross grade and was ready for
competition! A huge thanks to everyone involved!
While I love to read and write about me, I’ll pass along a couple of cool
things that are coming down the pipe in Nostalgia land.
There’s going to be another new class brought to you by the Adams Bros. Kin Bates Jr., the same guy who brought us Nostalgia’s answer to pro-comp (A-fuel), and the Adamses are working on another new eliminator class that will have the wire wheel set smiling. Here’s the poop on this new dragster class they hope to get going.
RULES: UNBLOWN--450 C.I. Max
In an effort to curtail costs their wishes are,
If interested in this class, call Gene Adams (Daytime) (928) 636-5148 Or Kin
Bates Jr. at (530) 224-1360 P.M. or Gary Adams at (208) 777-0553 Daytime
Also we have heard rumblings about a Funny Car circuit that Donnie Reeves and
Virgil Hartman are scheming on. Early rumors have a 50 percent nitro minimum,
pre 1980 body and an index to curtail costs and enhance the show.
It looks like as many as 25 dates could be had in 2005 with a Chicago-style format.
Want to go Funny Car racing? Here is where you can ask your questions: topfuelvirgil@aol.com.
Next month, we go to my first match race and my first night laps in a nitro Funny Car!
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