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Back then I was a fairly immoderate pot smoker,
but because of situations beyond my control,
did not bring any with me. Laws were more draconian
then than they are now, especially in the South.
Possession of one joint in suburban Atlanta
netted you 10 years on the chain gang in 1981
(or something like that). So, I wasn't feeling
masochistic, but. . .the mountain people. Moonshine,
Texas Tea, y'all sit around for a spell. The
wheels inside began to turn.
The next day, I think a Friday, I went up in
the grandstands on the far end, pitside of the
track. I always kept a clipboard to keep track
of the times of the three pro classes and two
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alky
classes, and those little props helped me to
get to know the locals at any race. They'd want
to know what I was writing down, I'd show them,
and we'd hit it off. On this particular day,
I went looking to hit it off with mountain people
and the introduction was not long in coming.
I espied three guys and a gal near the top
of the bleachers near the top end of the track.
Three beards and a bouncing babe. My hair was
fairly long back then, not all that common in
the South 22 years ago, and I started to keep
track of the Pro Stocks. After 15 minutes or
so, one of this wild-eyed quartet asked Whatcha
got there? I told them and we started bullshitting.
They liked to hunt and fish, all of them except
the gal worked in construction, and as we loosened
up (I occasionally bought a beer or two to calm
my shaking hands) we talked a little of personal
lives.
I let it slip that in my weirder moments I
liked to smoke pot. They in turn were more demonstrative.
"You wanna real buzz, Buzz?" one of them inquired.
As I turned to answer, this one guy pulled from
a beer-packed ice chest a small half-full Mason
jar with a clear liquid in it. Worldwise as
I was, I sorta knew what awaited in that somewhat
harmless-looking package.
"Well, since you put it that way," I said good-manneredly,
"I accept your token of friendship," and was
handed that jar. An effortless twist of the
wrist let the genie out of the bottle and I
took a slightly less-than-modest swallow, but
nothing you could call "hoggish." The stuff
went down exceedingly warm and then lingered
as a hot coal might in your shorts.
Gasp, gasp. "Say," I squeaked, "that really
gets your attention." I took one more draw,
handed it back this time with a mild wretch
and then a series of coughing reports. They
laughed, I laughed. And after an oil down, I
said I had to get to the pressroom and that
I'd see them later.
Much later. And as for the pressroom, I wasn't
walking around 10 minutes before I got numb
in the face, warm in the head, and, let's say
it, "Dixie Fried." Those two swallows were the
equal of a half joint's worth of good Hawaiian
or Northern California weed. I was no longer
in pressroom shape. I could just see the scene
if I flashed my Media card. Track topkick Steve
Earwood would see me mount the stairs in full
Samoan warrior skirts and spear, my frothing
face covered with body paint and blood. Innocent
city beat reporters scrambling out of the way
of a demented madman. As it was, it took me
a good hour or so to throw that stuff to the
point where I would want to talk to anybody.
I went to the Southern Nationals many times
after that first one, which was the inaugural
event, but I never saw that group in the grandstands.
I was kinda hoping I would and for a year, every
time I bought a bottle of tequila or bourbon.
I'd check the label to see if they had any "Have
You Seen These Missing Persons?" photos on them.
They didn't, dammit.
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