Photo by Jeff Burk

9/8/03

VIEWS on INTERVIEWS

"No doubt about it, my (insert name of sponsor) was really flying. Certainly as the driver of (insert sponsor's name), I'm happy we set a low e.t., but I'm really happy for all of our sponsors (insert names of sponsors) and my guys working on the (insert names of sponsors). There's a lot of good cars out there, so we can use a big run out of our (insert name of sponsor). If we can do that a few more times, you just might see (insert name of sponsor) in the winner's circle."

Have you heard that before or a reasonable facsimile thereof?

Of course, you have. I've written about it before, but not lately, and since it's still a problem for me and I know a lot of other fans, I thought I'd address this subject again. The subject? The dismal state of post-race interviews, drag racing, NASCAR or otherwise. The predictable, tuffus-smooching blather that the racers spout after a single heat of competition. A babble that is so predictable that it long ago became a parody of itself. When a crowd in a sports bar or friends in a den, without any encouragement from the prejudiced (like me), openly laugh or ridicule the majority of these interviews, and some viewers openly show their dyspeptic state with four-letter words, there is a problem....

... and I have a solution; a school for winners in front of the camera, and with me as the headmaster, at least for this moment. First of all there are some racers who can do the do at the mic. Obviously Force, Dean Skuza, Gary Scelzi, Whit Bazemore when he's ticked (actually quite a number of racers when they're ticked), Reggie Showers, these are some who give a good interview.

But so many others, and I'm not trying to be a wiseass, just don't do it right. They are sadly enough dull and predictable, and again, this isn't just NHRA racers, NASCAR's in this, too. There are only a few racers who don't hit you like an overdose of thorazine.

I do want to say that I've seen some good racer stuff in in-studio interviews and I'm guessing the reason is that they've had time to prep and, understandably, are out of the eye of the hurricane, i.e., a race. Still, way more people watch an actual race than a studio pump job, and that's why I think racer improvement is necessary here. Not only that, but much more importantly, I think the auto sport that solves the problem of trancing out the viewer is in for a much bigger fan base.

While watching it rain at Indy, I was enjoying my usual hotel lunch of cocktail weenies and a banana daiquiri and watching a re-run of one of the races which Larry Dixon Jr. had won. And I thought rather than Miller Lite this, Miller Lite that, the producers would better serve the wallets if they just ran a repeated message on a ribbon below the driver, identifying the major and key associate backers, and then Larry go at the mic.

"Am I happy that I won? Happy that I won?! I'm Larry Dixon. I expect to win. Defending World Champ. Eight wins in 16 2003 races. A 48-8 win-loss record and you ask me if I'm happy I won?! Pay attention, pal. The bus has pulled out of the station and you and the luggage are being sucked into the shadows. Lemme ask you this, how do you spell Top Fuel? Never mind, I'll' give you the answer in advance! D-I-X-O-N. Learn it! Live with it! Next case!"